May I ask you this question over and over again? “What do you want?” Chances are you’re more like me and have no clue what you want to do. It’s a struggle almost every adult goes through. “What do I want to do with my life? Think. Reflect. Meditate. Feel. One simple, innocent question. Yet the most evocative and inadequately fulfilled aspect… Continue reading What Do You Want?
I think of responsibility as response–ability: the ability to respond to life, people and events. While you may not be responsible for most of what happens. For some time, I’d worked with Noel, a 27-year-old young man who remained jobless. He blamed it all on his father. It’s not his doing. It’s his father’s doing that… Continue reading “Response-Ability” is Key
In Your Memories, Not in The Grave? At our first session, Riza’s eyes were filled with tears while I was speaking to her. Her mother died then only a few days ago. For the next 7 years or so, Riza continues to visit her Mom in the grave and celebrate her birthdays together with her… Continue reading In Your Memories, Not in The Grave
“The world breaks everyone,” writes Ernest Hemingway, “and afterward many are strong at the broken places. Orlando, one of my first clients, said in tears, “She didn’t have to leave me for that younger man in our company; she chose to leave me.” Divorce – “marital death.” It’s one of those life’s wounds that… Continue reading Strong at the Broken Places
There are two kinds of people. One is ready to change and the other is not. In times of dire need or emergency, change is crucial. The alternative is disaster. The voice of Riza, a distressed wife and mother: “I’m stuck. I promised my husband and kids that I’ll stop drinking and nagging them. But… Continue reading Ready to Change?
Because of Covid, people are more online nowadays. That very much includes psychotherapy and mental health treatment globally. As VeryWellMind put it, “In the face of the social distancing measures required in our COVID-19 crisis, many in-person psychotherapies are becoming online out of necessity. The past recent months, I do purely online sessions via Skype,… Continue reading OFWs and Mental Health
Total wellness requires balance. For those who do their work in a chair, this is a constant reminder. I’ve witnessed office workers, like call center agents etc, deteriorate in their physical health due to lack of balance. My work – psychotherapy, writing – is also predominantly work in a chair, using my intellect and voice.… Continue reading Mind- Body Link
Every year, I watch broken lives and broken homes come through my sessions. Each one an emotional disaster. More so since Covid came and onwards, millions of persons are affected by mental and emotional illness. The lack of adequate emotional first aid and skills is evident elsewhere: run-down hospitals, broken families, hunger or poverty, overwhelmed… Continue reading Where Will Help Come From?
Every action is an effort to avoid anxiety. That’s what psychologists would generally postulate. Behind every activity, every choice, every plan is an unconscious effort to avoid anxiety. A client once told me that he hates his job. Yet he still did his work no matter how much he disliked it. His hated job creates… Continue reading Facing Anxiety
In Red Cross, they have physical first aid. The concept and principles governing Red Cross First Aid training is equally valid for an Emotional First Aid program. Both Physical First Aid and Emotional First Aid have things in common. Both teach that damage in accidents or emergencies can be reduced or controlled by using basic… Continue reading What is Emotional First-Aid?