Remember consequences in your choices. A basic fact-of-life. Two kinds: good and bad. Your choices produce eventual conditions of life, which result in certain consequences. Dr. Maxwell Maltz is founder of a mental health healing system called “creative psycho-cybernetics.” He describes the good and the bad within each and everyone of us. Through creative psycho-cybernetics,… Continue reading Remember Consequences In Your Choices
Control Your Self When Talking
In repairing a broken relationship, a basic rule of thumb is: control your self when talking. “I’ve a very hard time talking to my husband. I feel so hurt and disrespected by his affair. I get out of control even attacking him physically,” shares Tina during a Skype therapy session. Even during our sessions together,… Continue reading Control Your Self When Talking
When You’re Living Out of Balance
It’s essential that you recognize when you’re living out of balance. “Are you out of your mind?” That’s a common expression we hear. It implies imbalance in thought processes. But there are three other factors in our being that could go out of balance: body, heart, soul. You’re “out of your body” when your natural… Continue reading When You’re Living Out of Balance
Find Your Flow
Find your flow. Like the flow of a chess player: “When the game is exciting, I don’t seem to hear nothing – the world seems to be cut off from me and all there is to think about is the game.” In psychotherapy, flow is key. When you’re totally focused and involved in the session,… Continue reading Find Your Flow
Look For Meanings When Bored
Bored? Look for meanings when bored. Boredom involves a loss of energy, interest, and momentum. It may be temporary or chronic. Boredom is cured when you find meaning in the things you do. The current global pandemic has locked up or restricted a lot of people. Boredom is one of its serious side effects. A… Continue reading Look For Meanings When Bored
Loneliness Is On The Rise
Loneliness is on the rise. People do all sorts of things when feeling lonely. Even absurd or strange things. What specific situations or experiences in your life make you feel so lonely? Jane Park was a lonely millionaire. The news reported that she offered men an annual allowance of p1.4 million pesos to date her.… Continue reading Loneliness Is On The Rise
How Can You Deceive Your Self?
How can you deceive your self? Francois de la Rouchefoucald once wrote, “We are so used to disguising ourselves from others that we end up disguising ourselves from ourselves.” One time, I was speaking to two lawyers. Husband and wife. In a marital therapy session. The wife showed pictures, text messages, and even a video… Continue reading How Can You Deceive Your Self?
Do Beat Your Fears
Do beat your fears! According to well known psychologist and author Dr. Dan Neuharth, fears are “perceived deficits.” Ignore it? Hide it? Deny it? Look the other way? Pretend? Overreact? Narcotize it? If you try any of these, you’re not overcoming your fears. Instead, you risk alienating and harming your self. Nurse Leo was the brother… Continue reading Do Beat Your Fears
You Can’t Control Other People
You can’t control other people. It’s a basic fact about humans. In my psychotherapy work, it’s a common symptom of mental disorders: to be controlling of others and their actions. People often neglect, deny, or ignore it. Or, just honestly unaware of what it is. The personal fallout is inevitable: unnecessary suffering. Ongoing misery. Martha is… Continue reading You Can’t Control Other People
My Reflections As A Father
My reflections as a father. This Father’s Day as I write this post. Yes, I’m a father. Almost 30 years now. 3 biological children, 2 step-children. Days ago, I was in a South Korean-owned tea house in the mall. Sipping my favorite hot honey green tea. Around me, I noticed an unusual number of fellow… Continue reading My Reflections As A Father
