Every action is an effort to avoid anxiety. That’s what psychologists would generally postulate.
Behind every activity, every choice, every plan is an unconscious effort to avoid anxiety.
A client once told me that he hates his job. Yet he still did his work no matter how much he disliked it.
His hated job creates anxiety. But he’s able to point to his greater or deeper anxiety of facing unemployment and money distress.
I’ve discovered that addicts, such as alcoholics or sex addicts, suffer from deep, unresolved anxiety.
The basic problem is not the addiction. The addiction is simply the outer symptom of a very strong anxiety and need.
The other night, I was with Ray. He’s gay, prone to picking men in public and having casual sex with them.
Whenever he felt stress after work at 5 pm, he could only endure the stress and anxiety he feels only with the help of homosexual activities.
Since his judgment was impaired, he felt it’s effective cure for him. Now, he’s sorting it out because it’s compounding his anxiety with both guilt and inferiority.