Beat your approval addiction. Screw what people say! Sounds harsh? It could save your life! Gigi, a dutiful daughter and medical student, was sharing with me how she grew up to be a “pleaser.” She derived much of her self worth from the approval of people around her. She’s so worried about keeping her parents… Continue reading Beat Your Approval Addiction
Category: Spirituality and Psychotherapy
Confrontation That Heals Best
Dysfunctional, offensive people need confrontation that heals best. And that is, when it serves love. My client, Bobby, 29, struggled with stopping and confronting his mother who continually abused him – physically, verbally, and emotionally. He wanted very much to establish firm, healthy boundaries. But his mother never honored it. She went on violating his… Continue reading Confrontation That Heals Best
How To Forgive Your Self
Healing is often a journey to learn how to forgive your self. “I’ve done a mortal mistake in my marriage doc, and my kids have become alienated to me. I can’t forgive my self,” shared Ricky during a Zoom therapy session. Ricky’s traumatic experiences happened 10 years ago. And he continues to still beat himself… Continue reading How To Forgive Your Self
Can You Know The Whole Truth?
Can you know the whole truth, and nothing but the the truth? Psychotherapy is about truth. Yes, nothing but the whole truth. Knowing it. Understanding it. Applying it in one’s life. Truth produces mental health and emotional well being. So what is truth then? Truth is reality as it is. Not as it seems to… Continue reading Can You Know The Whole Truth?
Think About The Work You Do
Do you think about the work you do? I mean, loving what you do. Consciously choosing it. And, finding meaning in your life through it. Last night, over Viber, I was speaking to a young man, Bobby, about his job. He’s struggling. Having employment-related anxiety and panic attacks. He had to take an indefinite leave… Continue reading Think About The Work You Do
Is It Love or Is It Addiction?
Is it love or is it addiction? Mental health is knowing and practicing how to be a whole person. That’s right: whole, not broken. Addiction is not love. You’re not whole when you’re addicted. Shiela is broken. Not whole. She’s convinced that she’ll suffer or even die without a man in her life. Over our… Continue reading Is It Love or Is It Addiction?
Keep Hope Strong or Disease Sets In
Keep hope strong or disease sets in. A “Broken Heart” study and its results was once published in the New York magazine. The study researched the mortality rate of 4,500 widowers within 6 months of their wives’ deaths. The findings? The widowers had a mortality rate 40% higher than all the other men of the… Continue reading Keep Hope Strong or Disease Sets In
Ask Yourself 3 Top Questions
Ask yourself 3 top questions. Yes, before it gets too late! Are you ready to meet, just as yourself? My 3 TOP QUESTIONS You Should Ask Your Self TODAY: Am I living for things that matter? Will I have what it takes to face this new stage of life? Do I have a real relationship… Continue reading Ask Yourself 3 Top Questions
Fight When You’re Disoriented
Fight when you’re disoriented. Since last year onwards, I’ve been witnessing a lot of my psychotherapy patients (including myself and family!) cave in at varying degrees of intensity due to the Covid pandemic. I call it psychological disorientation. An altered mental state. It’s often accompanied by a variety of other symptoms, such as confusion, unable… Continue reading Fight When You’re Disoriented
Know Your True Worth and Identity
Know your true worth and identity. In the 1980s, I was a leading chess player, captain, writer, and organizer in my university. I became chess champion. Chess was my life. When graduation came, I became depressed, lost, and anxious. I felt petrified. I didn’t prepare for a life outside chess and the university. I didn’t… Continue reading Know Your True Worth and Identity
