Whether you can believe it or not, you can control your emotions.
Countless times, this issue has always been a primal concern of wounded individuals in my sessions.
Especially true for those who have been abused or traumatized since early years.
Carlos was stuck last night. Still in much tears.
He’d feel the same emotions he felt since he was a little boy beaten up by both his parents.
Nowadays, he goes emotional when tired and stressed after work. And almost daily, he’d go for massage and “extra” sex service.
He was telling me that it has to do with the emotions he couldn’t control when distressed, angry, or mistreated.
He’s used to his favorite “escape” habit. Rather than merely endure, he self indulges.
“I can’t control it doc, yet I find myself all the more in tears and full of shame and guilt,” Carlos recounted.
Truman Capote once said,
“The brain may take advice, but not the heart.”
It’s in the heart where our emotions reside.
Emotions, which are “forever inexperienced,” as Thoreau would put it, do need to be retrained as well.
They’re actually not reflect actions. Such as blushing or sudden knee jerks.
Emotions are choices too. You choose them yourself.
They’re responses you can choose to what extent you’ll activate.
I’m reminded of a psychologist who entered a National penitentiary of convicted criminals.
His mission was to train the criminals how to be the boss of their emotions!
He performed an experiment there on the emotion of “anger.”
Firstly, he asked the convicts to go full at 100% their “anger,” then lower it to 80% and they’re able to.
Then progressively, he trained them to lower it to 70% … 50% … and 30%. And they’re able to!
Yes, you can control your emotions. Train them.
It can be difficult to control those emotions – but you do have control.
Learn how to train them!
“One ought to hold on to one’s heart; for if one lets it go, one soon loses control of the head too.”— Friedrich Nietzsche, German-Swiss philosopher and writer